As a pastor sometimes I have to try and help those who have received difficult news, like being told they have cancer. After being with them and listen to them and often crying with them, I remind them and myself just to do the next thing they know to do. To try and take things one day at a time. I'll never forget the best advice I got from a dear friend who was dying from stage 4 breast cancer and had the most positive and godly outlook on her situation. When I asked her how she could do this she replied "I put my hope in Christ and just walk one day at a time doing what I know to do for that day and trying not to focus on what tomorrow may or may not bring. Sometimes I have to walk moment by moment rather than day by day." I have found that advise to be so helpful. Do the next thing you know to do and don't worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will take care of itself. If I focus on tomorrow I often find the joy of living this day lost worrying about a thing that I have no control of at that time. I surely don't have it down like I wish I did. My daughter has epilepsy and it is hard to always live that out. But by God's grace in our lives, we try and remind ourselves of the truth, do the next thing we know to do and try and live in the present.
As my instructor, Danny Dryer, wrote to me on my last half--"Congratulations on showing up! That is much more important than how you finish or how fast you run"
I love Big Audacious Goals. The day after my first 5k, I signed up for my first marathon, giving myself a year to get it done. 7 weeks out from the marathon, feeling super strong and healthy after cautiously increasing mileage only <10% and ‘doing everything right,’ a high-hamstring injury smacked me into a new reality. Rest tamed the symptoms, but didn’t cure it. Ran anyway, doing the best with what I had, and finishing at 6:08, a far cry from my 4:30-ish expectation just 7 weeks before.
I’m 5 weeks out from a rematch with that marathon. Yesterday, I ran my first 20-miler of this marathon buildup, and my first ever trail race. Fell 2x, and after the second fall decided to walk the last super-rooted section because I could tell I was getting tired. It cost me 15-20 minutes, but I still made my 2nd goal of finishing <4h. I have another 20-miler in 2 weeks, and
I’ll run that one on the road to better set realistic race goals.
I like the practice of setting 3 goals for a big goal race: one for if everything goes absolutely perfectly, one for if a few things go wonky, and one for if things totally fall apart. At my age (58) ‘finish’ is always goal #3 and I’m happy with it. But goals are fluid things. At NYC I was <1 minute off my #2 goal so I called it ‘close enough’ 😜
I like the #irunthisbody movement not only for body shape but also for setting realistic expectations of what THIS body can do, and not comparing to my 35-yr-old friend who finished the trail race an hour before me 😖
As for your daughter and the auditions, politics and favoritism can play a big role. And teacher/directors may need to ensure diversity or other factors besides performance quality. Attitude can also be part of the decision-making: working hard on a supporting role can earn ‘points’ for future opportunities. 🤷🏽♀️ It’s a tough business.
As usual, I'm late to the "thread party"! But your topic this week, Terrell, is extremely relevant to my life right now! First of all, with regards to your stepdaughter, having had a daughter go through a flute performance track in high school and college, I believe there exists a huge political bias in the high school setting. Your daughter is clearly talented, and brave (you couldn't pay me any amount of money to sing solo in public!). This is one audition, one high school audition, and she should definitely not give up on her dream based on that!!! The hard work part is the hardest part! - hitting the occasional wall and getting to the other side. High school self-esteem is so fragile, which is another tough component. Whatever she does with regards to the singing, she can't let it end here, on this note (no pun intended!). So now on to running, (which everything I just talked about can apply to running!). I've been training for months to be ready for my first ever marathon on February 16th. I had studied many training plans, and made sure to do a combination of various types of running, cross training, strength/stretching stuff. I just did my last big run 4 days ago and have been having right knee pain every since! Backed off of everything but some yoga and lots of walking, taking Aleve, wrapped in K-tape. Feel like I'm in "running limbo". Want to do this marathon so much - I'm 57, no time like the present. But do not want to hurt myself in a permanent way so I can't do what I love so much, which is run. I welcome any thoughts from this community!
I am so sorry! I feel for you - been there too. It also happened to me during my last big run (I did 18 I think). Took a week off, foam rolled it. As soon as I ran more than 7-8 miles, I started to feel it. For my 20 miler I did signed up for the race, and first half I felt I was flying, but then that pain in self-identified IT band reminded about itself and did not go away anywhere. I finished 20, but last mile I had to walk a lot. My friend/coach suggested to drop from the full (that was Dallas BMW in 2018 December) to the half. I was so angry, frustrated, but the pain was there as soon as my mileage was around 7 or 8. And I took everything else easy. I needed to accept the fact that it was just hard on the body/legs. It was tough to switch to the half, but I am glad I did - I was running it and on mile 7-ish I felt that pain kind of distant first, but I knew it will come to me. I so wanted to beat 2 hours! Geez! Last two miles of the half I was limping almost all the time. I finished with 2:15-ish, limping, but tell the truth was glad I did not have to limp 13 more (!) or even worse to give up at all.
I gave a rest for 3 weeks, no running at all (thought I would go bonkers). Then started slowly, gently. In June 2019, I rock'n'rolled half in Seattle and then half in Virginia Beach - I beat 2 hours easy with no pain at all. Later that year (November 2019) I attempted my second ever full marathon - nailed it (BQed).
With all of my story, don't want to claim 1) you have an IT band issues 2) you need to do exactly what I did but if you have the pain and it present when you run, you for sure don't want to make it worse. That can lead to the longer recovery. It is just truly heavy toll on our legs when we train for the full. I am 48, so I am with you regarding no time like the present:)
Wow!! Thank you so much for telling me your story! It is inspiring for sure! And Congratulations on that BQ!! That is just so exciting! The one thing getting more than a few decades under your belt does is give you perspective. Although I am hoping to still bounce back from this knee thing and run on Feb 16th, I also am sure if this marathon eludes me, there can be another. And I know I can handle the training and the long runs in the future. Crossing my fingers for now. Good luck running Boston and thanks again.
forgot to mention - it was my right knee as well. Curious why there is? The way we run? The curve of the road? Differences in legs? Have no clue, but it was sharp pain, not fun at all.
Thank you so much - it will be 2021, and of course I am exciting, I've never thought I can do it and joked I might just aged into it if I stay healthy and keep running:)
I hope you bounce back and the knee does not bother you - I wish you all the strength on the 16th! Don't mean to sound ugly, but truly listen to your body. It is amazing you have been training for it (if you think about it, IT IS the hardest part) and even if life gives you lemons now, you will run another one and stay healthy. I keep my fingers crossed for you. I would still explore what options you have (switching distance, postponing your registration) - and whatever you decide, it will be a good decision, I am sure.
OMG you're the sweetest to remember! I ran it! My knee completely cooperated and didn't hurt at all! The absolute only down-side today was some foot and calf "Charley Horses" late in the race. I had to walk during each one till they loosed up. I was trying to stay on top of sodium and hydration, but I guess it caught up with me by the last few miles. So I lost about 15 minutes with that, but I still ended strong and am so happy that it all worked out. Thanks again for reaching out. Hope you had a great run this weekend!
Wanted to add my 2 cents regarding the book club: I personally liked the way you divided the chapters - it gave me some time to be late with getting the book, but then catching up reasonable. If it was just one discussion, I am afraid I might consider giving up. It sounds like childish, but I can confess it kept me accountable to keep reading so I can catch up at some point. It wasn't a long, thick book, but handling work-life-run unbalance did not let me to read it as much as I would like every day. But what is the most important, it kept me wanting to find time to squeeze reading it. I'll go with one discussion if you want to try, no problems at all. May be for a shorter read it would work just fine. It also reminds me about the plan of running a longer distance - if you think at once, it's scary. If you break it into parts and picture yourself completing those parts, it looks doable.
As for your stepdaughter - not saying it would work, but how about her asking to give her another chance for the audition? Let's face it, sometimes they think we only need X students, no more. But what if X+1 are all good? How can you make the cut? If she loves it, she needs to believe in herself more than anybody else believes in her. Go and talk to those audition people? Ask what prevented her to be picked? Find another audition? It's hard to know what works and what should be done. For sure still keep moving forward your dream, your goal.
That is really good advice — I’ll definitely share that with you. You’re so right — as a friend of mine once said to me, “if you don’t vote for yourself, how can you expect anyone else to?”
As a pastor sometimes I have to try and help those who have received difficult news, like being told they have cancer. After being with them and listen to them and often crying with them, I remind them and myself just to do the next thing they know to do. To try and take things one day at a time. I'll never forget the best advice I got from a dear friend who was dying from stage 4 breast cancer and had the most positive and godly outlook on her situation. When I asked her how she could do this she replied "I put my hope in Christ and just walk one day at a time doing what I know to do for that day and trying not to focus on what tomorrow may or may not bring. Sometimes I have to walk moment by moment rather than day by day." I have found that advise to be so helpful. Do the next thing you know to do and don't worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will take care of itself. If I focus on tomorrow I often find the joy of living this day lost worrying about a thing that I have no control of at that time. I surely don't have it down like I wish I did. My daughter has epilepsy and it is hard to always live that out. But by God's grace in our lives, we try and remind ourselves of the truth, do the next thing we know to do and try and live in the present.
Thank you, Jack, for such an amazingly thoughtful reply. Those are wise words for us all.
It came across today and I thought it's worth sharing with all of you:
"I have learned over the years that when one's mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear."
- Rosa Parks, "first lady of civil rights"
I needed this today -- thanks so much for sharing!
Nice. Good thought to run with while running through a snow storm!
As my instructor, Danny Dryer, wrote to me on my last half--"Congratulations on showing up! That is much more important than how you finish or how fast you run"
I love Big Audacious Goals. The day after my first 5k, I signed up for my first marathon, giving myself a year to get it done. 7 weeks out from the marathon, feeling super strong and healthy after cautiously increasing mileage only <10% and ‘doing everything right,’ a high-hamstring injury smacked me into a new reality. Rest tamed the symptoms, but didn’t cure it. Ran anyway, doing the best with what I had, and finishing at 6:08, a far cry from my 4:30-ish expectation just 7 weeks before.
I’m 5 weeks out from a rematch with that marathon. Yesterday, I ran my first 20-miler of this marathon buildup, and my first ever trail race. Fell 2x, and after the second fall decided to walk the last super-rooted section because I could tell I was getting tired. It cost me 15-20 minutes, but I still made my 2nd goal of finishing <4h. I have another 20-miler in 2 weeks, and
I’ll run that one on the road to better set realistic race goals.
I like the practice of setting 3 goals for a big goal race: one for if everything goes absolutely perfectly, one for if a few things go wonky, and one for if things totally fall apart. At my age (58) ‘finish’ is always goal #3 and I’m happy with it. But goals are fluid things. At NYC I was <1 minute off my #2 goal so I called it ‘close enough’ 😜
I like the #irunthisbody movement not only for body shape but also for setting realistic expectations of what THIS body can do, and not comparing to my 35-yr-old friend who finished the trail race an hour before me 😖
As for your daughter and the auditions, politics and favoritism can play a big role. And teacher/directors may need to ensure diversity or other factors besides performance quality. Attitude can also be part of the decision-making: working hard on a supporting role can earn ‘points’ for future opportunities. 🤷🏽♀️ It’s a tough business.
As usual, I'm late to the "thread party"! But your topic this week, Terrell, is extremely relevant to my life right now! First of all, with regards to your stepdaughter, having had a daughter go through a flute performance track in high school and college, I believe there exists a huge political bias in the high school setting. Your daughter is clearly talented, and brave (you couldn't pay me any amount of money to sing solo in public!). This is one audition, one high school audition, and she should definitely not give up on her dream based on that!!! The hard work part is the hardest part! - hitting the occasional wall and getting to the other side. High school self-esteem is so fragile, which is another tough component. Whatever she does with regards to the singing, she can't let it end here, on this note (no pun intended!). So now on to running, (which everything I just talked about can apply to running!). I've been training for months to be ready for my first ever marathon on February 16th. I had studied many training plans, and made sure to do a combination of various types of running, cross training, strength/stretching stuff. I just did my last big run 4 days ago and have been having right knee pain every since! Backed off of everything but some yoga and lots of walking, taking Aleve, wrapped in K-tape. Feel like I'm in "running limbo". Want to do this marathon so much - I'm 57, no time like the present. But do not want to hurt myself in a permanent way so I can't do what I love so much, which is run. I welcome any thoughts from this community!
I am so sorry! I feel for you - been there too. It also happened to me during my last big run (I did 18 I think). Took a week off, foam rolled it. As soon as I ran more than 7-8 miles, I started to feel it. For my 20 miler I did signed up for the race, and first half I felt I was flying, but then that pain in self-identified IT band reminded about itself and did not go away anywhere. I finished 20, but last mile I had to walk a lot. My friend/coach suggested to drop from the full (that was Dallas BMW in 2018 December) to the half. I was so angry, frustrated, but the pain was there as soon as my mileage was around 7 or 8. And I took everything else easy. I needed to accept the fact that it was just hard on the body/legs. It was tough to switch to the half, but I am glad I did - I was running it and on mile 7-ish I felt that pain kind of distant first, but I knew it will come to me. I so wanted to beat 2 hours! Geez! Last two miles of the half I was limping almost all the time. I finished with 2:15-ish, limping, but tell the truth was glad I did not have to limp 13 more (!) or even worse to give up at all.
I gave a rest for 3 weeks, no running at all (thought I would go bonkers). Then started slowly, gently. In June 2019, I rock'n'rolled half in Seattle and then half in Virginia Beach - I beat 2 hours easy with no pain at all. Later that year (November 2019) I attempted my second ever full marathon - nailed it (BQed).
With all of my story, don't want to claim 1) you have an IT band issues 2) you need to do exactly what I did but if you have the pain and it present when you run, you for sure don't want to make it worse. That can lead to the longer recovery. It is just truly heavy toll on our legs when we train for the full. I am 48, so I am with you regarding no time like the present:)
Wow!! Thank you so much for telling me your story! It is inspiring for sure! And Congratulations on that BQ!! That is just so exciting! The one thing getting more than a few decades under your belt does is give you perspective. Although I am hoping to still bounce back from this knee thing and run on Feb 16th, I also am sure if this marathon eludes me, there can be another. And I know I can handle the training and the long runs in the future. Crossing my fingers for now. Good luck running Boston and thanks again.
forgot to mention - it was my right knee as well. Curious why there is? The way we run? The curve of the road? Differences in legs? Have no clue, but it was sharp pain, not fun at all.
Thank you so much - it will be 2021, and of course I am exciting, I've never thought I can do it and joked I might just aged into it if I stay healthy and keep running:)
I hope you bounce back and the knee does not bother you - I wish you all the strength on the 16th! Don't mean to sound ugly, but truly listen to your body. It is amazing you have been training for it (if you think about it, IT IS the hardest part) and even if life gives you lemons now, you will run another one and stay healthy. I keep my fingers crossed for you. I would still explore what options you have (switching distance, postponing your registration) - and whatever you decide, it will be a good decision, I am sure.
Today is the 16th and I hope you are running! Or walking, jogging but moving forward! Wish you all the strength and enjoyment
OMG you're the sweetest to remember! I ran it! My knee completely cooperated and didn't hurt at all! The absolute only down-side today was some foot and calf "Charley Horses" late in the race. I had to walk during each one till they loosed up. I was trying to stay on top of sodium and hydration, but I guess it caught up with me by the last few miles. So I lost about 15 minutes with that, but I still ended strong and am so happy that it all worked out. Thanks again for reaching out. Hope you had a great run this weekend!
Oh my, you should be proud of yourself! So happy you were able to do it. Enjoy all those sweet feelings now:) and enjoy the rest for your legs.
And indeed, I had a great run yesterday - thank you!
Thanks so much for all your words of support and your inspirational story. And make sure you let us all know about Boston next year!! Big hug.
Thank You! I am sure you all will be tired of me telling the story of me "running the Boston" part of life :) LOL
Wanted to add my 2 cents regarding the book club: I personally liked the way you divided the chapters - it gave me some time to be late with getting the book, but then catching up reasonable. If it was just one discussion, I am afraid I might consider giving up. It sounds like childish, but I can confess it kept me accountable to keep reading so I can catch up at some point. It wasn't a long, thick book, but handling work-life-run unbalance did not let me to read it as much as I would like every day. But what is the most important, it kept me wanting to find time to squeeze reading it. I'll go with one discussion if you want to try, no problems at all. May be for a shorter read it would work just fine. It also reminds me about the plan of running a longer distance - if you think at once, it's scary. If you break it into parts and picture yourself completing those parts, it looks doable.
As for your stepdaughter - not saying it would work, but how about her asking to give her another chance for the audition? Let's face it, sometimes they think we only need X students, no more. But what if X+1 are all good? How can you make the cut? If she loves it, she needs to believe in herself more than anybody else believes in her. Go and talk to those audition people? Ask what prevented her to be picked? Find another audition? It's hard to know what works and what should be done. For sure still keep moving forward your dream, your goal.
That is really good advice — I’ll definitely share that with you. You’re so right — as a friend of mine once said to me, “if you don’t vote for yourself, how can you expect anyone else to?”