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Christine's avatar

My stepfather has an annual tradition at the start of every new year to ask himself these questions:

- What do I need to give up or shed in my inner life?

- What do I need to cultivate or invite into my life?

- How do I want to help or be of service to others?

For me, replying to those questions involves new ways of thinking, seeing, and doing … which relates to giving up old habits and creating new ones.

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Diana M. Wilson's avatar

I love those powerful question!

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

I love this, Christine -- those really are the most important questions in life, aren't they? (Or at least some of them!)

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Clark Rose's avatar

Oh Terrell. I kept reading and hoping you had the way but of course we have to discover our own...or not? Better Together of course.

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

Exactly! I wish I had more answers for you -- I promise to keep exploring, though. I feel like I'm in a stage where the questions are as/more interesting than the answers, you know?

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Clark Rose's avatar

Yes. When we believe we have the answer, we are probably asking the wrong question.

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Sharon Dene's avatar

I know how this is when you come into your old ruts. I've changed so much in the last few years since living in seattle. I always have plans and everything else.And I keep going along blah blah blah. Then 1 day I woke up and realized I needed to make some changes and I got a job at U.P.S. This gave me another opportunity to walk away from the kitchen in eleven months I've been cooking for 45 years and it seems like a rut. I hate it every day but I do it anyway. But I have a plan and I'm really excited about it. And I'm focusing more on my running and my reading and I think I'm back the way I used to be. Things are always hard for me and I would just let myself go into the same patterns over and over but I woke up and I made some decisions and I am a better person for it. Life changes as you get older every decade is a new challenge. This decade, in my 60s. I will be moving to a new state and being closer to my family. I read a book a long time ago and call passage. And this book really is interesting. Because it gives you a focus and how you can accomplish goals and I like your comment. People don't want to change, but sometimes you need to change because you grow and you learn and you think about things but you always have your memories. Which are good, some good some Not

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

I think I know this book! Is it the one by Gail Sheehy?

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Sharon Dene's avatar

It is and i'm reading this book since I was in high school which was seventy five or seventy six And I read her another book.When it was published as well, I think she's a great writer.I still have like copy around somewhere

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Nilima Srikantha's avatar

In the meantime, I'll keep rowing. . . one million meters, two who knows. . .very meditative. . . :) Its a practice that never ends.

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Jerry's avatar

Ah, change constant and difficult. The world changes moment by moment, but for us it seems such a long and winding road. Comfort is so hard to leave for a new world of …

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

It is, isn't it?! Was there more after the ellipses?

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Jerry's avatar

the unknown and strange. Scary

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Henriette Lazaridis's avatar

A great piece. Thank you for those James quotations, which you put into helpful context. I'm love routines--though I change up my routines from time to time--and I can tell I've fallen off of a routine when I start to feel aimless or grouchy. This is an excellent reminder to re-establish certain patterns in order to free up my brain for the bigger stuff.

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Diana M. Wilson's avatar

I decided to be “true to my word” on the eating front when I got HORRIBLE blood panels in the fall. I went vegan (no statins) and reduced my bad cholesterol over 100 points in a relatively short time. There was more “pain” in the idea of taking statins then there was connected to changing my diet—and that’s what invariably pushes me to change habits—when the pain of continuing with a “bad habit” outweighs the “benefit.” So I guess I’m a reluctant gluten-and sugar-free vegan. (With an annual cheeseburger and French Fry MEGA splurge.) T—FANTASTIC essay.

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

WOW, Diana!!! That is some seriously positive, healthy change right there. I'm so impressed that you did that so fast... wow. And thank you!!!

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Blue's avatar

Great post Terrell thank you. This time of yearly is rough. The weather sucks. work is awful and there is not a whole lot I can do about either. Sometimes it’s hard to feel in my heart just how precious time is when it’s snowing and cold and I’m looking at a third fourteen hour shift in a row. I’m really not trying to whine I know full well things could be worse. I just appreciate the reminder to find something even if it’s just a little something to bring a little light verses just trudging through the dark on autopilot and just letting the days fall away. ❤️

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

Thank you, Blue!! I feel for you, my friend -- definitely been there vis-a-vis shitty work situations. Hopefully you'll be able to get some well-deserved time off soon.

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Blue's avatar

Thanks Terrell it’s not so much about me it’s more that the health care system is falling apart and it just sometimes feels kinda helpless. No beds anywhere we really haven’t recovered from COVID and I don’t see it being better anytime soon. The bureaucracy is ridiculous. Bad flu this year be careful out there. I’m going to the run show in Boston next weekend which will be a welcome change. Come on Spring 😎just need some sunshine 👍

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Anne, RD & Avery, CHC's avatar

Great post -- awareness of our habits, good or bad, is key. Thank you for sharing Terrell!

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

Thank you so much, Anne + Avery!

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Greg Puckett's avatar

I have a new job at the beginning of the year. My office is a different direction than my old office. For seven weeks, I have only driven to the old office three times by accident. I consider this a win. Change and habit are both difficult.

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Terrell Johnson's avatar

That's so interesting!! (I can see myself doing that too, actually!)

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