💬 The case for quitting?
When is it better to opt out, rather than keep going?
Earlier this week, I stumbled across a post by Lindsay Crouse, a longtime runner and former journalist who’s written extensively about women’s sports, and who has a new book coming out this fall, The Case for Quitting, whose subtitle, “the surprising benefits of opting out” caught my eye.
I started thinking to myself, remembering a time when I trained for a marathon, back when I was in my mid-twenties. A woman who was training with us was having serious difficulty keeping up with the mileage, especially when she joined us on the long runs each weekend.
But still, she kept at it.
Until one long run, when an ambulance had to be called — she’d taken a fall and hurt herself pretty badly. I felt terrible for her, and don’t remember seeing her come back after that.
And I thought of myself, sticking with things in my own life that I knew weren’t working, but I kept at them regardless, out of a sense of needing to persevere — even though I knew they weren’t right for me.
Have you ever experienced this — in running, in sports, or in life? What did you do, and what did you learn? — Terrell
Personally, I admire the bravery and strength of those who decide to opt out or quit based on a personal decision making process. I quit a very good job about 8 years ago. It was a tough decision but I knew I would be happier going forward. Thank goodness it all worked out and I have never regretted it.
As far as participating in endurance events, I have quit a long distance cross country ski event when I realized that I just was not up to the distance. I had not slept well in the days leading up to the race and I knew I did not have the energy and resolve to finish it and enjoy the process.
On the other hand, I know of an ultra race that I really want to drop out but I was too far in and there was not a good stopping point. I just kept going. Somehow. Circumstances forced me to continue. I finished the race but it was not a pretty picture.
this is such a great topic - thanks, Terrell!
I will say first - in running - I also took a bad fall (broken bones, teeth, surgery...), and I have gained so much from *not* quitting.
my running comeback is 2+ years in the making, and it's been hard. but I'm so glad I *didn't* quit.
But your question actually made me think of a work situation:
I was struggling, and it felt so hard. Of course I thought the problem was me (and of course, it was! at least partially..). But I couldn't figure out how to make it better. It was just a bad fit - but I believed I could, through the force of my will, change it.
I couldn't.
I remember that one day, on my way home, I just heard a voice, loud and clear in my head: 'I'm done'. It was the truth.
After that, I felt so calm. Even though I didn't have another job - or any prospects for one! And even though it took a few more weeks - I resigned, and headed out to the unknown.
It was one of the best things I've ever done.