A thought provoking concept. I think there are more than three acts - upon reflection, I'm in my fifth (I'm 86) with each act having many scenes. Are there more to come? I certainly hope so.
As for running, I am participating in the Northern Virginia Senior Olympics track and rowing events on Saturday and their 5K on 3 Oct. Then 3 more 5Ks (Halloween, a Turkey Trot and New Year's Day).
And I love that thought… I hope there are more than three acts too! We tend to think of them as growing up, getting married and having kids, and then…. we don’t really define what comes after, do we? So you can make it whatever you want, can’t we?
Terrell, so many of us can empathize with your story. As a wise and now departed friend told me many years ago, "At the end of a run, I have the same problems I had when I began. But somehow they don't seem as important." Among the many benefits of running, it can help us get through the more difficult parts of our lives.
Great existential questions Terrell that I know you will find the answers given the myriad responsibilities in your life. My Dad taught me years ago that "Responsibility" is the "ability to respond" to what deeply matters in one's life. I leave the rest to you my dear friend.
Terrell, this is a beautiful essay about change & chapters. The problem with these layoffs is that they activate our survival instincts--we need housing and food--so they are HUGE moments in our lives. I'm so glad you are working now a job you love. I had been wondering. And I want to thank you again for introducing me to Substack. It has been an amazing platform for me.
I’m so glad to hear that, Janisse! It’s been so much fun for me to see you embrace it and see where its possibilities can take you. You’re a hero to me as a writer, by the way — you have no idea how inspiring you’ve been to me (and countless others, I know.) And I’m following your new adventure with this new family you have — such a beautiful thing.
Sometimes the end of an act is a brick wall. Cruising, cruising, smash! Painful, shocking, disorienting. Which way is up, is there an up? Who will I be?
Other acts end not at a wall, but at the top of a slippery slope. Life seems to be gradually going downhill. All too soon you find yourself in the dark shadows of a deep canyon. You wonder if you know how to climb.
Another part of the play has you as the author. Perhaps this act will be fully on the sunny side. You do your creative best, but have learned to always carry an umbrella.
Without sounding too silly, “that’s gold, Jerry!” (If you remember Kenny Banya from Seinfeld) But I really do mean it — maybe whatever is swirling right now is the sign that something new is ahead, and I just need to embrace that rather than holding onto the past, you know?
Terrell, thank you for sharing this! Personally, I'm on the cusp of turning 60, so I feel you about life transitions, and stages of life starting and ending.
There's a sadness and an anxiety - and also a wonderful sense of freedom, I think.
My husband and I are in the midst of talking about retiring. He makes most of the money, but he doesn't love his work or feel particularly fulfilled by it. We just figured out that we're financially ok enough for him to retire at 59.5 - which is just two years away for him.
I'm super excited about that for him, but he's a little more guarded. and he's not sure he wants to retire then. I think the transition scares him. and all the things - his mortality, his sense of being a provider, the place where he can't make any more excuses, he has to reach into his soul and see what's really there, what he really dreams of. It's a lot.
We were talking about how years ago, I quit my well-paying church job with benefits to go out on my own and start my own ministry/business. We had two kids about to go to college. We planned it all out and it worked financially. Then, just a few weeks after I quit my job, Jeff got laid off! We went 8 months with very little income! It was terrifying.
but each night we would pray together, and we would say out loud: 'some day we will be on the other side of this, and we will look back and see how it worked out'. And it did. And we are.
This is such a moving comment, Cathie. And this part especially hit me like an arrow through the chest:
“the place where he can't make any more excuses, he has to reach into his soul and see what's really there, what he really dreams of.”
That’s the place we get to at this age, isn’t it? There are so many — good! — reasons not to go after what you really want when you’re younger, and right at the top of that list is money. I’m so heartened by the way you and your husband approached it, especially after his layoff hit. I’m going to share this with my wife tonight.
Beginnings and endings overlap, I think, especially when we hit the older phases of life. Routines shift slowly or suddenly whether due to loss, injury, or illness. When you have time to acclimate to a big upcoming change like becoming an empty nester, you have the gift of time to ponder and prepare for what might come next. Anything is possible! It’s both exhilarating and frightening at the same time, stepping into the next version of you.
If there are 3 acts my 3rd is just starting. We dropped my youngest off at college at the end of last month and my oldest last night at JFK as she headed to London for her study abroad. So my wife and I are officially empty nesters. What do we like to do? What do we like to eat? Where do I put my worries now if they're not on where my kids are at 1 am? Parenting obviously isn't over and we'll have parents weekend in 5 weeks. Still the day to day no longer concerns the school day, lunches, dinners, pickups, driving lessons all the parenting things. So how to fill the time, we'll find out.
On that note I missed the start of fall training. How many weeks are we in? I'm going to jump into whatever week the group is on. I can't be too far behind. Looks like we're in week 3. I'm going to do the 16 week. 4 days of running fits my schedule better.
The three-act frame lands because almost everyone quits in Act II — the stretch where it stops feeling like progress and starts feeling like maintenance. Same in a marathon build and in a company. Act III belongs to whoever survives the boring middle.
As always, your thoughts provoke introspection on the part of this reader. My “Next Chapter” came at retirement from a 52-year career (my decision). For me, it was easy … being able to do or not do anything I want is bliss. I have maintained my connections to Odyssey of the Mind, a kids creativity competition because getting kids to think outside the box and work in teams is a life lesson worth learning.
Actually, it’s international. Winners in local regions go to state finals. Winners at state finals go to “world” and compete against teams from across the US as well as teams from foreign countries. Five different areas of competition: Build an 18g balsa wood structure that holds weight (I’ve witnessed 600 pounds of weight for 3 seconds) — build a vehicle (some years-ride-on, some years-not that performs tasks) — classics problem where a classic is performed with a modern twist — apply a different solution to a basic problem — solve a problem with a performance. Groups also compete in a spontaneous problem in front of judges and no audience … given just a couple of minutes to come up with a solution … more points for more creative answers
A thought provoking concept. I think there are more than three acts - upon reflection, I'm in my fifth (I'm 86) with each act having many scenes. Are there more to come? I certainly hope so.
As for running, I am participating in the Northern Virginia Senior Olympics track and rowing events on Saturday and their 5K on 3 Oct. Then 3 more 5Ks (Halloween, a Turkey Trot and New Year's Day).
Always look for the positive and good running!
i agree, more than 3 for myself. maybe less for someone younger. and i hope to be doing all that you are doing when i'm 86! heck when i'm 70!
Go Ken! 🙌 Good luck this weekend my friend.
And I love that thought… I hope there are more than three acts too! We tend to think of them as growing up, getting married and having kids, and then…. we don’t really define what comes after, do we? So you can make it whatever you want, can’t we?
Terrell, so many of us can empathize with your story. As a wise and now departed friend told me many years ago, "At the end of a run, I have the same problems I had when I began. But somehow they don't seem as important." Among the many benefits of running, it can help us get through the more difficult parts of our lives.
That’s really beautiful, Mark — I’m going to save that. Thanks so much for sharing it 🙏
Great existential questions Terrell that I know you will find the answers given the myriad responsibilities in your life. My Dad taught me years ago that "Responsibility" is the "ability to respond" to what deeply matters in one's life. I leave the rest to you my dear friend.
I love that, Clark! You’ve got me thinking… 🤔
Terrell, this is a beautiful essay about change & chapters. The problem with these layoffs is that they activate our survival instincts--we need housing and food--so they are HUGE moments in our lives. I'm so glad you are working now a job you love. I had been wondering. And I want to thank you again for introducing me to Substack. It has been an amazing platform for me.
I’m so glad to hear that, Janisse! It’s been so much fun for me to see you embrace it and see where its possibilities can take you. You’re a hero to me as a writer, by the way — you have no idea how inspiring you’ve been to me (and countless others, I know.) And I’m following your new adventure with this new family you have — such a beautiful thing.
You are so kind and good. Thank you.
Sometimes the end of an act is a brick wall. Cruising, cruising, smash! Painful, shocking, disorienting. Which way is up, is there an up? Who will I be?
Other acts end not at a wall, but at the top of a slippery slope. Life seems to be gradually going downhill. All too soon you find yourself in the dark shadows of a deep canyon. You wonder if you know how to climb.
Another part of the play has you as the author. Perhaps this act will be fully on the sunny side. You do your creative best, but have learned to always carry an umbrella.
Without sounding too silly, “that’s gold, Jerry!” (If you remember Kenny Banya from Seinfeld) But I really do mean it — maybe whatever is swirling right now is the sign that something new is ahead, and I just need to embrace that rather than holding onto the past, you know?
Terrell, thank you for sharing this! Personally, I'm on the cusp of turning 60, so I feel you about life transitions, and stages of life starting and ending.
There's a sadness and an anxiety - and also a wonderful sense of freedom, I think.
My husband and I are in the midst of talking about retiring. He makes most of the money, but he doesn't love his work or feel particularly fulfilled by it. We just figured out that we're financially ok enough for him to retire at 59.5 - which is just two years away for him.
I'm super excited about that for him, but he's a little more guarded. and he's not sure he wants to retire then. I think the transition scares him. and all the things - his mortality, his sense of being a provider, the place where he can't make any more excuses, he has to reach into his soul and see what's really there, what he really dreams of. It's a lot.
We were talking about how years ago, I quit my well-paying church job with benefits to go out on my own and start my own ministry/business. We had two kids about to go to college. We planned it all out and it worked financially. Then, just a few weeks after I quit my job, Jeff got laid off! We went 8 months with very little income! It was terrifying.
but each night we would pray together, and we would say out loud: 'some day we will be on the other side of this, and we will look back and see how it worked out'. And it did. And we are.
I think the same will be true for you.
This is such a moving comment, Cathie. And this part especially hit me like an arrow through the chest:
“the place where he can't make any more excuses, he has to reach into his soul and see what's really there, what he really dreams of.”
That’s the place we get to at this age, isn’t it? There are so many — good! — reasons not to go after what you really want when you’re younger, and right at the top of that list is money. I’m so heartened by the way you and your husband approached it, especially after his layoff hit. I’m going to share this with my wife tonight.
Beginnings and endings overlap, I think, especially when we hit the older phases of life. Routines shift slowly or suddenly whether due to loss, injury, or illness. When you have time to acclimate to a big upcoming change like becoming an empty nester, you have the gift of time to ponder and prepare for what might come next. Anything is possible! It’s both exhilarating and frightening at the same time, stepping into the next version of you.
So true, Christine!
If there are 3 acts my 3rd is just starting. We dropped my youngest off at college at the end of last month and my oldest last night at JFK as she headed to London for her study abroad. So my wife and I are officially empty nesters. What do we like to do? What do we like to eat? Where do I put my worries now if they're not on where my kids are at 1 am? Parenting obviously isn't over and we'll have parents weekend in 5 weeks. Still the day to day no longer concerns the school day, lunches, dinners, pickups, driving lessons all the parenting things. So how to fill the time, we'll find out.
On that note I missed the start of fall training. How many weeks are we in? I'm going to jump into whatever week the group is on. I can't be too far behind. Looks like we're in week 3. I'm going to do the 16 week. 4 days of running fits my schedule better.
BEAUTIFUL.
Thank you (always!), Diana!
The three-act frame lands because almost everyone quits in Act II — the stretch where it stops feeling like progress and starts feeling like maintenance. Same in a marathon build and in a company. Act III belongs to whoever survives the boring middle.
Love this, Randy!
As always, your thoughts provoke introspection on the part of this reader. My “Next Chapter” came at retirement from a 52-year career (my decision). For me, it was easy … being able to do or not do anything I want is bliss. I have maintained my connections to Odyssey of the Mind, a kids creativity competition because getting kids to think outside the box and work in teams is a life lesson worth learning.
Actually, it’s international. Winners in local regions go to state finals. Winners at state finals go to “world” and compete against teams from across the US as well as teams from foreign countries. Five different areas of competition: Build an 18g balsa wood structure that holds weight (I’ve witnessed 600 pounds of weight for 3 seconds) — build a vehicle (some years-ride-on, some years-not that performs tasks) — classics problem where a classic is performed with a modern twist — apply a different solution to a basic problem — solve a problem with a performance. Groups also compete in a spontaneous problem in front of judges and no audience … given just a couple of minutes to come up with a solution … more points for more creative answers
That’s so cool, Dave! Is Odyssey of the Mind local to you, or is it in other cities too?